new baby

Harper, Summer 2017

I wanted to break away from my usual blog posts and write something a little more personal...my three girls. I am constantly photographing them playing, and sometimes I wish I could stop being artsy and enjoy the moment. But I can't help it! I think, oh that would make for a great photo! Or, the lighting right now is perfect! My eldest was recently dancing in our backyard in her underwear, and I fear that if I don't photograph it, I'll one day forget about these carefree days and the magic of childhod. While I will spare her the embarrasment of putting those photos of her online, I will post some of my favorites from the summer this far.

You may notice a lot more black and white photos than color. This is because I simply adore black and white images. They speak to me so much more, and make me FEEL so much more. There is something so raw, unfiltered, timeless and real about black and white. It seems rare to find people other than photographers who share these opinions. But when I do, well, I've found a new soulmate! Ok, back to my children.

Harper is my first born. I was so ready, so excited, so....IMPATIENT. I wanted to have children ASAP. It was my goal and dream to be a mother. She was born the first week of January, and very shortly after her birth I started to recognize symptoms of postpartum depression. Depression and anxiety are things I have dealt with for many years, so I was aware that I could fall victim to these issues postpartum. I wanted to be a mom so badly, then when she was born I felt so ill equipped, isolated, overwhelmed, and scared. I was exhausted but I couldn't sleep. The pressure to breastfeed pushed me deeper into this dark hole. I didn't want to tell anyone for fear that my baby would be taken away, or that I would be deemed an unfit mother. It wasn't that I didn't love her, because I did, fiercly. I just didn't know how to handle those negative thoughts and waves of panic and sadness that rushed over me. I had taken anti-depressants pre-pregnancy, and I took it upon myself to start them again. Thank goodness I did, because I started to feel relief and normalcy shortly after. Nothing can prepare you for having a child, you are just thrown into it full force. People will tell you about functioning on little sleep, about endless diaper changes, about pumping, about hardly getting time to sit down and eat a meal. Despite being told all that, the reality of it still hits you like a wave. Eventually you adjust and it becomes part of life, but going from selfishness to selflessness is a difficult transition. I see the world so differently now that I have children. My interactions with people, with nature, with myself are all so vastly different, but in a good way. I fully recovered from PPD, but the experience was very grounding. And guess what? We had two more children...TWINS!

Before I get to my youngest babies, I would like to say more about Harper and what a positive influence she has been on my life, and what a kind soul she is. Even as a baby, Harper was very cautious. She had to assess a situation or person before deciding whether or not she wanted to be there. If there was too much stimulation or unfamiliarity, she would let you know. I started to wonder if there was something wrong because of how serious she was. But alas, I learned that it is just part of her personality. She takes a lot of time to warm up, even in school where she goes twice a week, and with friends that she plays with on a regular basis. Once she is comfortable, she'll let loose and have a great time. But, I always have to allow that extra time for her to adjust. Harper teeters beween being independent and wanting to be by my side every moment of the day. She is very much a mommy's girl, and goes through phases where only I can do things for her. While this gets exhausting, I know one day she may not want anything to do with me. In my opinion, Harper is an introvert. She enjoys going on errands or to the park, but she's also happy to stay home and play or watch a movie. I see a lot of myself in her, which could be why we connect like we do. I will often tell people that I feel sorry for her because we brought two newborns home when she was not yet two. It was a huge and difficult adjustment. When there isn't man on man coverage anymore, someone is going to get less attention. Because she wasn't a crying infant, oftentimes that meant she had to play alone, deal with interrupted story times, and not leave the house too often. Now she is 3 and a half and won't ever remember what it's like to not have siblings. I hope they grow closer and closer together, because sisterhood is so sacred. I love you so much, Harps. You've made me a better person. Thank you.

Next up, Isabel and Grace!

 

 

 

Natalie's Maternity Session

Natalie and her husband are expecting their first baby, a girl, within the next few weeks! Natalie wanted to do a lifestyle session in her home, which I LOVE! We also went around her neighborhood to capture some of the blooming trees. I can't wait to hear of baby's arrival and the name they choose (it's between Olivia and Audrey...awwww!!). Here are some of my favorites from this session: 

Kingston

It was a gorgeous spring day when I went to do Kingston's newborn photos. He was due at the end of March, but made his debut at the end of February instead. I was actually supposed to do maternity photos for his parents, Crystal and Chad, literally days before he was born! He clearly had other plans! 

Kingston is the first born to these lovely parents, who were clearly head over heels for him. They have a gorgeous home with bright, natural light in several rooms (a natural light photographer's dream!). His nursery was one of the best I've seen, beautifully decorated with his name, a slew of board books, and a cozy rocker.  He is such a lucky and loved baby! I hope you enjoy taking a peek into his new life as much as I enjoyed taking these photos!

 

Quinn

Baby girl Quinn was born in February 2017. I was thrilled to be able to capture the images of her and her family during her first weeks of life. She was so calm and sweet the entire time...in fact, I don't think she fussed once! Her parents, Sara and Scott, were over the moon with their new baby girl. Quinn is their first child, so naturally there is some adjustment to be had in their household! Sara's parents were also visiting at the time of the shoot, and they were incredibly nice people and so helpful. I remember never wanting my mom to leave when I had my first baby too! It is all so overwhelming, so having a close family member who has been in your shoes is essential! Even though it's scary to be left alone with your baby for the first time (how am I going to handle this?!), us moms have way more strength than we realize. Here are some of my favorite images from this lifestyle newborn session!

**Click on the current photo to be taken to the next one!

 

Jack

I met 4 month old Jack and his mom, Carolyn on a Saturday afternoon. Jack took some time to warm up to me and eventually his mom was able to get some smiles out of him. He reminded me of my eldest daughter as a baby...so serious! In reality, they are just thinking really hard and assessing every detail of a new situation. Nothing wrong with that! 

Luckily, Jack's mom was my ideal client in that she was willing to try anything and go anywhere! While I did work on some posing with Jack, I mostly went for the documentary style photo shoot (eek, my favorite!). I timidly suggested (I say timidly because I really didn't know how Carolyn would feel about it) giving Jack a bath. Some of my favorite photos of my children are in the bathtub, so I thought we could capture some really sweet moments. I often look back and photos and am surprised at how quickly moments pass where we didn't even notice how magical it was. Call me corny, but I have the privilege of capturing facial expressions and emotions that you probably wouldn't notice otherwise. Lucky for me, Carolyn was on board with the bath idea (yay!)! 

Carolyn and I talked a lot about motherhood in general...how nothing can prepare you for it, and how bittersweet it can be. Bitter in that it rocks your world in terms of marriage, friendships (no more going to the bar with your kid-less friends, on to play dates), and your identity, both personally and professionally. But it is so sweet in that you created this tiny human that you love so much, and you suddenly cannot possibly imagine life without them. One of my favorite parts about photographing newborns or doing lifestyle/documentary sessions is that it gives me the opportunity to form relationships with other parents. I love it even more when the relationship continues outside the session! I am so thankful that I was able to connect with Carolyn and capture some of these fleeting moments with Jack. 

I am so excited to share these sweet moments between mother and son. 

 

Triple Threat

As a twin mom, I have a lot of connections to other mother's of multiples. This has not only been great for my social life, but it has also been great for my art and storytelling. When I heard that Jaime had triplets, I just HAD to take her newborn photos. Jaime has no family history of multiples, so the fact that their first born was going to actually be their first THREE born was quite a shock. Jaime and husband Wes welcomed Ariah Marie, Logan Grace, and Crosby James into the world at 29 weeks gestation on Thanksgiving Day. Mr. Crosby was still on oxygen at the time of the photo shoot, but all are healthy, happy babies! 

For me, going from no children to one child was a more shocking experience than going from one children to three children. Perhaps it's because I knew what to expect, or I was already used to thinking of my child before myself. Either way, it's hard for me to imagine being thrown into parenthood with three infants. Jaime and Wes are rocking it! 

When I arrived on Sunday morning, the babies had recently eaten and were fast asleep. That gave me plenty of time to assess the lighting and decide how I wanted to set up. I started by taking some individual photos of Ariah because 1. she's an adorable baby with a head full of hair, and 2. I was told she's the good sleeper! As promised, she stayed fast asleep while she was wrapped up and moved around. I then dived head first into my first triplet session by getting them all undressed (with the help of Wes and his mother), wrapped in cheesecloth, and placed into my new newborn prop...a huge basket! Using props is a newer concept to me, as I usually use whatever the parent's have lying around the house. However, the basket was a success and I'll definitely be using it again! 

The babies did fabulous for the photo shoot and stayed asleep 80% of the time. I was so nervous that they would all be fussy, but each one of them was easy to settle and in such good spirits. Jaime and Wes were completely chill the whole time too, which made things that much easier! Overall, they were the perfect family to use as my intro to newborn multiples photography, and I hope to photograph the triplets more as they grow. I'm thinking a photo shoot will be much more difficult with three toddler running in all different directions!

 

 

Baby Sage

For awhile I was on a boy streak, and now I am on a girl streak! I photographed baby girl Sage and her family in their Boulder, CO home. I will admit I was jealous of their secluded, open property. They had gorgeous views, and it was a breath of fresh air (literally!) away from the hustle and bustle of the city. They also had perfect lighting in their home, which as a natural light photographer, made the experience so enjoyable and smooth. 

Sage arrived on December 30th, 2016, and she joins her big brother Forrest. I am sure those two will have so much fun romping around their mountainous open space one day. Forrest was so fun to photograph, as you'll see from the photos below. He was in such a good mood and LOVED getting his picture taken. He was so sweet with his baby sister and seems to have adjusted very well to the new addition. I hope you enjoy viewing these images as much as I enjoyed creating them!

 

Baby Izzy

I did newborn photos of this sweet baby girl in late December. Her parents were thrilled to welcome her into their family! I think her momma was the most excited because of all things girly...bows and ruffles galore! She also joins big brother Grayson, who wasn't too sure how he felt about a new baby in the house. We were able to sneak in some sweet sibling photos, even if we did have to bribe him! 

 

Baby Kambria

Kambria arrived on December 28th, 2016! She joined her big brother, Kamdan, and made this wonderful family complete. I love how easy going and fun this family was to work with, and I am so honored that they asked me to do their newborn photos. It is so much fun to see a couple or a family for their maternity photos, and then to see them again once the baby arrives. As a mother of three, I love to chat with the new parents to see how everything is going (feeding, sleeping, mood, etc.). It is so important to document those first few weeks of life because chances are, you'll forget them. In the sleepless nights and general fog we find ourselves in with a newborn, those precious moments just slip away. I know these images will be treasured for a lifetime. Enjoy.